Fall Movie Preview

IT: Chapter 2 – You paid to watch 2 hours and 15 minutes of children getting eaten by clowns. Now you’re going to pay to watch 2 hours and 49 minutes of children and adults getting eaten by clowns. To be fair, the cast is excellent, with James McAvoy, Jessica Chastain, and Bill Hader playing the kids from the first IT, but 27 years older. It’s up to them to recreate the chemistry of the Loser’s Club that made the first movie so strangely endearing, despite being a movie made up entirely of rather repetitive jump scares. Hopefully, the kids growing up means that the scares will have matured too. (September 6th)

Ad Astra – Every year seems to have one big space movie besides Star Wars, and Ad Astra is this year’s offering. The story of Brad Pitt traveling through the solar system in search of his father sounds interesting enough, as long as it isn’t filled with the overly pretentious dialogue that bad sci-fi movies use to seem more important than they really are. (September 20th)

Joker – The other mean clown movie coming out this fall, which is out to prove that it isn’t going to try to make an origin story for a character who doesn’t need one by doing precisely that. Don’t get me wrong, it will make tons of money. It has a great cast, and it will most likely be a good movie. But there’s a reason everyone considers Heath Ledger’s portrayal the definitive version of the Joker, and it wasn’t because we got to see him spending time with his mom before he started robbing people. (October 4th)

Gemini Man – Life of Pi came out in 2012 and won Academy Award for its Visual Effects and for its Director, Ang Lee. Now, he is making another VFX driven film, except this one isn’t gonna win that Oscar. This Will Smith vs Will Smith thriller has a decent concept and a great lead actor, but young Will Smith looks like he just got off The Polar Express. (October 11th)

Zombieland 2: Double Tap –  This is the long-awaited sequel to the zombie movie that came out a year before The Walking Dead made zombies cool again. This one was only made because the cast of the first one went on to become big stars (mostly), but the trailer shows that the creators know exactly what made the original a hit and seem to not be rehashing the same plot, so what’s the harm in watching Tallahassee trying to get some Twinkies again? (October 18th)

Terminator: Dark Fate – Again!?!? Again!?!?! Sure, James Cameron is involved this time, but don’t forget he endorsed Terminator: Genisys. (November 1st)

Frozen II – People in my class would expect me to write a lot about this movie. But I’m going to defy expectations and just say that it looks pretty good. (November 22nd)

Jumanji: The Next Level – Danny DeVito’s personality is stuck inside the Rock. I’m sold.  (December 13th)

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker – Following up the incredibly divisive The Last Jedi might be an insurmountable task. How do you create a finale that pleases fans who hated it for taking risks (admittedly not all of which worked) whilst other fans who didn’t like how much The Force Awakens relied on nostalgia? Guess we’ll only know once the movie starts and we see what gets more screentime: Starkiller Base II or Green Milk. (December 20th)

Cats – Gemini Man may be unsettling, but this movie is on a different level. The cats themselves, who still resemble their very famous actors, are made using effects that look like they were made for a horror movie, and not for a family-friendly musical coming out for Christmas. I am very scared. (December 20th)